Trust Your Inner Guidance: The Best Decision Making Advice I Received

This article has been authored by Stand Out Online Member Nicole Novoselsky, Radically Rewired

Let's talk about decision making and how to use your inner guidance. As someone who is incredibly indecisive but also incredibly intuitive, I want to shine light on the experiences that have led me to be more in my power.

Whether you’re feeling pulled in tons of different directions or you’re simply not sure which direction to go, this episode is for you. It’s actually comical looking back and seeing how much I needed outside opinions to help guide my life. Still to this day, I catch myself asking people to help me make decisions as if they know me better than me. I thought that someone knew the golden answer that would be the missing piece to solving all of my life’s problems.

If I would really sit with myself, I knew deep down what felt good and what I needed - but I was so disconnected from that part of me that I would immediately go to what other people thought in order to make the quote unquote right decision. It's like this innate part of me seeking validation and approval.

Because if someone else told me what to do, and it didn’t work out then it wouldn’t make me wrong. It wouldn’t be my fault that my life wasn’t working out. It was because someone else made the decision for me. I was so dysregulated that I wanted someone else to regulate me.

In all areas - in relationships, in business, in my own habits, etc. I would take advice from any and all people without seeing how it felt in my own body. One person would tell me something about what I should do with my life and I would get excited, and then the next person would tell me something to counter that decision and I would be left all confused on what to do.

Don’t get me wrong. Taking advice from someone you trust and from someone who is doing what you want to do can be a total step in the right direction. Of course, we don’t know what we don’t know. And actually working with mentors who know more than me in specific areas AND who are embodying and living a life I want to be living, has been indispensable in getting me to my goals and living the life I want. It’s like a fast track to get to where you want to be with the right support. It’s a beautiful thing.

However, it is so important to always tune back into yourself and see how the advice sits with you. How it resonates with you. Because even though we are all similar in certain ways and cookie cutter advice can work - there are nuances and with the energetics of everything - if you’re only doing something because someone told you it’s going to make you money or make you happy, yet it isn’t of your highest values, it’s not going to workout the same way for you.

You Versus the External Voices

After I checked in with myself and made the intuitive decision to go to Bali to get my yoga teacher certification, I was then faced with more enormous decisions. When covid-19 hit back in 2020, my plan of teaching english in the classroom was no longer an option. In my opinion, this was a blessing in disguise so that I could focus on the projects in my heart that I was more excited about - building my own business. The thing is: I knew nothing about building my own business, and I didn’t really have a clear idea about what the heck my business would be. All I knew I was I wanted to share my life. The issue was that I was like a chicken with my head cut off and getting advice from literally any person that wanted to put their 2 cents in. Strangers even! And of course, if you ask 100 people, you’re going to get probably 100 different answers. The opinions and advice I got were conflicting, so I was always in conflicted mode on what to do and I didn’t know how to go forward.

I listened to advice from people I didn’t vibe with because I saw their success and I wanted it. But the way they were going about gaining their success didn’t resonate with me. My body was actually rejecting it, but I was forcing full speed ahead because my mind logically wanted it. I got burned many a times. I took on projects and did work exchanges with people because I thought it would move me forward to the coveted success that I wanted, but really, I was just neglecting a part of me that actually knew the answer.

I felt constantly overwhelmed and dysregulated because I wasn’t listening to myself. The only way forward is to sit with yourself. As cliche as this sounds, the answers are inside of you and how the information feels in your body. What brings you joy? Follow your highest excitement and sit in that emotion. People of course can be messengers. Sometimes it can be hard to hear our own inner voice and we meet people who give us a message. However, it is up to us to pay attention if this person is a messenger or if it’s actually a check-in to see what it is we really want.

So we have to tap into our body and see how this makes us feel. To see how the advice or the message sits with us. Is it an f yes, an f no or a maybe?

The Best Advice to Tap Into Decision Making

Now the best authentic advice I received about decision making is that only YOU know. Only you know the complete nuances of the situation you’re in and other people are coming from their own experiences, so it’s wise to always come back to your own body and knowing. Perhaps in your own process, you will find it healing to consult a trusted friend for advice. And if you don’t clearly know, pause. Wait until you get that knowing that it is indeed time to act.

Here’s part two of the advice:

When in doubt, do nothing. Sometimes, it is important to simply choose instead of getting so caught up in the cycle of being stuck. But you’ll know. If you’ve been spinning your wheels for so long, you may have a moment of okay I just have to choose already and be happy with whatever decision I make!

However, sometimes, we force upstream. To make decisions because we feel like we have to. When I’ve been unclear, I feel in my body that I need more information in order to make a decision. So I wait, and then more information comes in or time passes by and I feel differently and there’s a clear cut answer.

Beware of the Pedestal

Often, I’ve put people on pedestals thinking that people with more experience, knowledge, and money know better than me. And time and time and time again, it’s like the Wizard of Oz. Have you ever seen the Wizard of Oz? Where Dorothy puts all of her faith in the wizard thinking he will have the advice to solve all of her problems and he is seen as this all knowing grandiose wizard and then the little dog toto pulls back the curtain and simply shows this normal looking human man just pretending to be this great wizard. This has happened to me so many times. I put people on pedestals just to realize that they in fact are human too, and the only person that really truly knows the answers is you. I

t’s all within you when you get in touch with yourself and listen to that voice. When you hear what other people are saying and notice how it is resonating with you and then decide how you want to perceive and navigate the situation. And when it feels fuzzy and unclear, give it time and space to let the murky waters disperse and you find more clarity to really truly make whatever decision you need. Yoga and meditation can also help you clear the murky waters. Luckily, I have tons of yoga and meditation videos on my YouTube channel that you can check out. These will help on your journey towards a higher consciousness and a quantum leap toward the life you want to be living.

An Exercise to Listen & Connect With Yourself

So I’ve been using this technique for a while now, but I never had any fancy name for it. I simply called it the Value Goal Audit, but then I wanted something more fresh and fun, so ChatGPT helped me come up with the “Mind Compass Calibration” good ole MCC. So in order to help you with decisions, it’s important to connect with your deepest values. What are you wanting out of life? Do the actions align with the values? Tuning back into your values and then asking does this action align with where I want to go or is it distracting me and taking me away from my vision and mission? Envision a compass in your mind and then think about the decision - > is this decision helping you embody the person you want to be? How does it feel in your body to think about the decision.

Taking a pause and giving yourself space and time to sit with the decision can help confirm your direction. Even in adulthood, we are plagued by our own conditioning. So in order to transform our lives, improve our mental health, and manifest our dream goals, becoming conscious of our values and what brings us joy can propel us to our highest potential. This can be a beautiful integration to your meditation practice.

If you're wanting support on your path and you're ready to experience that sacred feeling of actually being in alignment with your deepest purpose, then I have the perfect FREE mini training for you. To get support in taking the first step to your most aligned goal, sign up for this free training on my website: www.radicallyrewired.co. ‍

Want additional support and accountability in going after your goals? Let's rewire your brain to attract in your dream life so you can feel more excitement, fulfillment and bliss. For more information on my 1:1 and group programs, take a look at my Freedom Fast Track Membership on my website www.radicallyrewired.co. I can't wait to work with you.